A Wee Fiction - One Day In The Life Of Derrick Mooney by Douglas Lloyd

Here's something by an old acquaintance of mine, Douglas Lloyd. Haven't seen him for years. According to his biog it was first published in 1989, in a magazine called Scottish Stories. Not available on the internet, unfortunately. However, the story has just been republished on the excellent McStorytellers site:

http://mcstorytellers.weebly.com/one-day-in-the-life-of-derrick-mooney.html

I think there's a definite Kelman influence. Either that or Slim Scotchboy. Maybe both.

Practical Criticism - Advice From Your Examiner

The pavement
outside the pub.
Look at him,
sitting there.
On his own.
Scribbling poems full of tears and pining
for women he has loved.
The pint of Guinness
at his elbow,
and a wee tumbler
of Macallan,
the ten-year-old,
much superior to the thirty.
Puffing on his fags
(he knows they are Bad,
but he's hooked).

He's an MA candidate's cliche come true.
Of course he is - look -
misogynist
racist
ageist
healthist
homophobic.

It's easy to find
now I've told you
what to look for.
It's easy to bend it.
It's easy to cheapen it.
It's easy to get a
good mark
in your exam.
Don't reflect.
Regurgitate -
please.
Original thought
is so much more difficult
to mark.

Astoria

Scrounge the coins

for a Nescafé.

You think
you look like Mickey Rourke?
Well, no.
The glamour in your life
comes from the Guardian
folded on your knee -
delivered by the
SAS.

Two days late.

Faded

picture of a girl
green ink on the envelope
words that meant nothing

A Wee Fiction - The Weird and Wonderful World of TEFL

I wrote a series of short pieces under the title 'The Weird and Wonderful World of TEFL #1 - #30'. Here's numbers one to ten, first published on Ink Sweat and Tears.

# 1

Sally got sacked for bringing stray dogs to class, although she swears it was because she refused to wear shoes.

To read numbers two to ten, go the the Ink Sweat and Tears site:
 
http://ink-sweat-and-tears.blogharbor.com/blog/_archives/2010/11/19/4683968.html

End

right arm swings the stone
granite hewn from Ailsa Craig
dont push; let it go.

Hockey Player

A valued member
of the team -
Right Wing
(he could run like fuck).
His stick was Sondico
21 ounce
with a nail in it.

A Wee Fiction - A New Life

Over the next few weeks I'm going to be posting links to stories I've recently had published, along with short extracts. I'm going to begin with 'A New Life', which, in a way, is where everything started. It's about a young man's first night in a foreign country.

A New Life - first published on McStorytellers.

She drove in silence. It was 1 o’clock in the morning, but the roads were full of cars heading into the city. There was something on the radio, Bon Jovi. I asked her if that kind of music was popular here. Western music. She glanced at me, then reached down to increase the volume.


The full story can be found here:
 
http://mcstorytellers.weebly.com/a-new-life.html

From 'Drive!', by Andrew McCallum Crawford

Rimmer was sitting on the toilet, enjoying a post-ejaculatory Gauloise and ruminating on that new catchphrase that was being bandied about everywhere – Safe Sex. He was a practitioner, of that there was no doubt. No one would be transmitting viruses to him, oh, no. He was, and would remain, as clean as a whistle. He stroked his appliance, which was balanced on his knees. Meticulous aseptic technique, that was the key.

You can find out about Rimmer, his appliance, and a whole host of Edinburgh misfits in Andrew McCallum Crawford's debut novel, 'Drive!' - available at these links:

Amazon co uk
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Drive-Andrew-McCallum-Crawford/dp/9609929605/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1301770515&sr=8-1

Edinburgh-shop com
http://www.edinburgh-shop.com/bk-007.html

Lone, Loner, Lonest

Loner

He gave up
playing with his friends
before he
broke them.


Loner (2)

He gave up
playing with his friends
before they
broke him.


Loner (3)

They gave up
playing with their friend
because he
bored them.